| 24 Nov 2021 |
 @joepie91:pixie.town | one suggestion that I sometimes make to people in emotional distress is somewhat related: grab a stopwatch, and set yourself a 1 minute delay for every message you send | 10:42:45 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | just, when you read something, wait for the stopwatch to expire, and only then write your reply | 10:43:01 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | it's a very simple no-thought-required trick, just always one minute, and it helps a lot for people to collect their thoughts and respond less impulsively | 10:43:27 |
 @zimbatm:numtide.com | yeah that seems useful | 10:44:07 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | it's also a much easier sell than 'meditation' because it looks purely pragmatic | 10:44:10 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | while still achieving pretty similar results | 10:44:27 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | meditation also takes much more time investment. It takes a while for the benefits to kick in. | 10:44:44 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | right | 10:44:55 |
| * @joepie91:pixie.town is now thinking about mediation courses | 10:45:19 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | similarly, I don't know that technically-minded people are necessarily ready to invest time to learn about leadership and moderation | 10:45:58 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | oh, they are not, that is why we have so many moderation issues in tech | 10:46:16 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | it's not a part of the culture, yet | 10:46:22 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | in the same way that 'communication' in general isn't | 10:46:30 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | it's because the value is not immediately apparent | 10:46:51 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | that is probably a part of it, but there's another factor that I think should not be underestimated: the amount of people who went into computers because "computers are much easier to deal with than people" | 10:47:23 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | I think we can get quite far by setting up a team and try some of these things out, without the enforcement side | 10:47:24 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | I'm definitely one of those people :) | 10:47:47 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | * I think we can get quite far by setting up a team and try some of these things out, without the enforcement side (not saying we don't need the RFC) | 10:48:20 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | many people in tech communities are, but that has also shaped the culture around tech to consider 'dealing with humans' optional, which has a lot of ramifications not just in terms of moderation, but also project management, etc. | 10:48:23 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | a good example of this is the decision-making process in the Nix community, for technical things | 10:49:41 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | I noticed that things tend to be worked on alone | 10:50:10 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | it works fine for package bumps | 10:50:21 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | when the topic gets too large, we often end in decision-paralysis | 10:50:41 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | yeah | 10:50:54 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | typically what happens is that there is a lot of armchair commenting happening, and that one alone person gets discouraged | 10:51:22 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | right, because we don't really have constructive collaboration structures in place | 10:51:41 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | this is one of the biggest problems of the Nix community, in my view | 10:52:28 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | it's a part of why I think we should expect people to learn about communication and community management, despite that not being the dominant culture | 10:52:31 |
| @zimbatm:numtide.com | it leads to a lot of burn outs | 10:52:46 |
| @joepie91:pixie.town | it's simply necessary to keep the project healthy | 10:52:47 |
